I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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