How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
