i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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