Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
