4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Randomize
