My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
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