i permit you to call me
it was like his penis was on wheels.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize
