after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Randomize
