"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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