god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
wow bdsm is so cute
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize