Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
