You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
