After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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