Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Randomize
