Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
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