You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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