I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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