Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
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