So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize