Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
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