Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
