Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
