sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could fuck to npr.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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