I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
