Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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