Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
