Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
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