I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Randomize
