Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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