i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
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I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
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we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
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