in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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