No, you can still breathe under the balls.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize