Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Did you just see the Batmobile???
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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