Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
