Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
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