just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
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