Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
