I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
