She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
