I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize