Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Randomize