I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
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