I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Randomize
