quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
