Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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