ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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