hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
