Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
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