i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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