Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
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