if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
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