we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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